This should not scare you. The pastor in your church is an individual whom should not demand obedience. He is a teacher, but he is not over you. Everyone is on the same level. No person is over another, but each Christian needs to mutually submit to each other. That is, everyone has checks and balances. We need to recognize Jesus as king because He is the supreme personage to be obeyed. We also need to obey the government and be good citizens, because we need to be Christian models. Now, when it comes to choosing between government and Christ, choose Christ. He is the way. Paul and Silas had to do this. Since we are a family, everyone needs to submit to each other out of love for each other. He freed us from the law of sin and death. So, if He freed us, we need to walk in the Spirit and abide in Jesus Christ. Now, if a man demands obedience, simply do not follow him, because that is not God's will. (Ps. 118:8) If the person is Jesus, then follow Him. God is the Word, so learn from Him and you will grow. Obey the Lord, because he will steer you in the right path. Also, obedience brings rewards. Remember that.
God has written his law on our hearts, so where does obedience come from? It comes from the heart. You can't impress God with your works. Now, when you believe, your good deeds will be on your heart. But you can't do this by yourself, or else it is legalism. If we want to grow in obedience, then we must have our foci on God.Back Home